artichoke

what do you care about?
what do you love?
these were the questions i was told to ask as a photographer

in the clouds

sometimes the studio happens other places
and sometimes these posts are poems

present2artist

i have had some insight,
into this project
especially into the drawing part
perhaps there needs to be more experimentation
perhaps there needs to be more innovation
perhaps there needs to be more "duration"
perhaps there needs to be more risk

the artist is present

after visiting marina's (long awaited) performance today
this is what i have decided will be my response
(and impact my next 2½ months)

and clearly i was wrong:


photo of marina's performance is allowed ,
but not
(of course)
in the exhibition itself

artist almost present

so...
clearly not my studio
but
a space which for me,
by virtue of what it will become over the next 2.5 months,
because of the energy that will resonate here
holds the same sort of intimacy & inspiration
that i associate with the studio
and today
(judging from the no photo signage)
may prove to have been
my only opportunity to have shot it

i do intend to make some sort of work connected to this show
(as i did with the house with the ocean view) 
i have had some ideas
some more extreme than others
but i won't really know
until i go tomorrow


at the opening this evening, not my pic:


Ulay, Marina Abramović’s partner from 1975-1988, sits with her during her performance. This was the first time they “performed” together since The Great Wall Walk (1988), when they each walked over 1,200 miles (2,000 km) along the Great Wall of China starting at opposite ends and meeting in the middle to say their goodbye.

The Museum of Modern Art, March 9, 2010, Photo by Scott Rudd

marina abramović

red book dialogue with lee robbins
tonight's discussion focused more around marina's intent in making art
than it did on jungian principles in action

a lot was said about fear and confronting it,
a lot was said about duration and how extended periods of time make a space where things evolve that could not have occurred otherwise,
mindfulness was also mentioned

and these 3 things have particular relevance for me in this moment;
today i left my job
(it wasn't so many hours a week but it seemed to occupy a large space in my life)
so that i can commit fully to the studio
i have talked about having this kind of life for years, decades actually
and in certain moments, i have
but it has now become necessary to confront the fears that have often kept me from committing fully to myself

duration is something that i have always felt important to making the work...
having extended periods of time to enter the process and exhaust it
work to the edge to create the space for something new that can only come when everything else has been completely used up.
ironically, when thinking about planning my life/time going forward
i have been foreseeing structuring time in the studio into manageable chunks,
to allow myself to feel as if i have met a goal, completed something
so that i can say that my work is done for the moment
there is a balance here that needs to be considered

mindfulness to keep from wandering aimlessly and getting too lost in minutiae
mindfulness to constantly re evaluate
as the things i anticipate
manifest in ways i could not have foreseen
a certain fluidity is going to have to develop:
not my strong point

at one point marina talked about art and how she found music to be the highest form because of the purity and directness with which it addressed the human spirit
(my interpretation)
and then she felt performance art came next
because, after all doing what she did was much harder than
for example
going into one's studio with a cup of coffee, turning on the music and painting
i love that
because for me
that very activity
on many days
is the hardest thing
i can imagine doing
and the scariest
but more importantly
the only thing possible

4 charles

this afternoon, i went to a memorial service for charles seliger
he lived a life that i can only aspire to
a life of dedication to paint, family, friends
a life of generosity & graciousness
a life of never ending learning
i knew all this about him
but to listen to family, friends & fans speak so lovingly & passionately
made me wish i had taken greater advantage of the opportunity to know him better

red book

jung's red book
jung, more than any other mode of enquiry
be it religious, psychological, scientific or philosophical
offers for me the most inspiring and comprehensive paradigm for living and creativity

and while the principles of his teachings still guide my process
i used to engage more in direct study
and i feel this is something missing in my life

attending this discussion reminded me of this
it reminded me of the support i received from engaging in this way
and of the power that comes with belief & a sense of purpose
i hope i can start to reconnect back
and leave some of the other stuff
that replaced this
behind